In the meantime, I am even confirmed every day that I am going the right way. Every further step in the direction of Leonie, in the direction of my very own personality, which I have not copied from anywhere, which comes completely out of myself, makes me only happier. Every moment I perceive through Leonie is much more conscious than ever before. The last time I was like this was in childhood, when I could still be the way I just was or wanted to be.
As Leonie I managed to break through a huge, felt impenetrable, inner blockade. As Leonie I have the feeling that I can and am allowed to do everything. As a woman, I am finally “allowed” to do all the things I have longed for all my life. Of course, no one has ever directly forbidden me to be the way I want to be, but as Dennis it was somehow impossible for me, it just felt wrong, whereas as Leonie just everything feels right, what I feel like, what I enjoy, what makes me happy.
Since I identify myself daily and more and more with Leonie, I perceive every day sooo much more consciously and I look forward to every new day for the first time again and in the evening I am sad that the day is already over again and can hardly wait for the next day, just like it used to be in my childhood. There are so many new things for me to discover, regardless of the overall exciting world out there, I have so much to catch up on and I just want to try so many things that were denied to my old self.
After three years of self-discovery, I’m now at a point where I can absolutely imagine a complete transition and am sure it’s the right path. Because it makes me completely happy to be perceived as a woman, because I feel like a woman, because I long for a more feminine body, because I finally want to turn my inner self inside out in all respects, because I want to be seen exactly as I am and above all, because I want to look in the mirror and see ME.